I am having to write a rough draft of the blog the evening before because I am now back to riding out for the racehorse trainer down the road, and I have to be at the yard at 7a.m!
So, I am sat here in bed editing this post this morning at 6a.m because I have to put it together, proofread it and publish it before I go!
I thought about doing it later in the day, but I am now snowed under with other things because typically, everything seems to be happening at the same time.
I've decided to just give you an update today because my recent posts have been quite difficult to write and although important, they're stirring up a lot of unwanted memories from the past. I'm going to have to be careful and look out for my own mental health first and write some less involved posts in between the difficult ones.
I now have some interest from a couple of literary agents for the book, which is obviously great, but now there is even more work to do.
Anyone who’s written a book will know this, but writing the damn thing is the easy part, trying to get representation and a good publisher is much harder! I have spent nearly as long on the query letter and synopsis as I did writing the entire manuscript, and now they want a book proposal as well.
This is quite stressful because this is what the agent takes to the publisher, so I’m feeling the pressure to get it right. I am finding the whole thing quite demanding because writing a book proposal is incredibly difficult and I have no experience of doing it.
The fact that people like Katie Price can get a publishing contract without even writing a single word is infuriating me because celebrities have no idea what those of us living in obscurity, have to do in order to get our writing noticed!
Trying to persuade people that I know what I’m talking about and have an important message to share is exhausting, but I keep reminding myself that I am doing this for other people and that pushes me on to keep persisting.
I know why people give up at this stage of the process – it’s just so utterly frustrating and exhausting when you’re putting in so much effort and getting nothing back! At the moment I’m devoting 2 hours a day to the blog and then the rest of the day to answering emails that are requesting help and advice, as well as the book (editing, proposal, submissions, follow up calls and emails) and I earn absolutely nothing from any of these things!
Anyway, if anyone either knows a literary agent, a publisher that won’t expect me to pay, or knows how to write an excellent book proposal, will they please get in touch?!
I’ve been quoted £85 an hour for help with it and I simply can’t afford that when I’m earning virtually nothing and trying to pay for £350 private doctor’s appointments to stay well! This obviously has to be the priority because without my mental health, and staying in remission from bipolar disorder, I am useless to everyone!
This afternoon I am doing a zoom call with a charity called Elmore Community Services who support people with a range of mental health difficulties in Oxford. I am going to be their guest speaker so I’m a little bit nervous about that but I know if I’m going to help people then public speaking is going to play an essential part in achieving that.
I will be writing about how that all goes tomorrow so look out for that!
Right, I must go and gallop racehorses! Haven’t done this in a while so I’m sure I’ll be crippled later!
Thanks for reading,
Speak to you soon,
TR
www.dyingtostayalive.com
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